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Previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons...
We left our friends in a perilous scene where everybody except Sullivan Sleight and Glim were, um...
Taking naps, slackers.
Taking naps on the job.
Moot makes an electric appearance.
I'm imagining him coming down, like, floating down, but like, he's got a harness on.
There's personal wires.
Oh, buddy, don't look too closely at some of these guys.
They look like they may be your friends.
Well, they were your friends.
No, I see that.
Don't look. They said don't.
Well, I was here before you. I saw...
We cut ahead as you're being led out of the cavern that you're in.
And you pass by various pictograms on the walls showing images that look very similar to the mind flayers
coming up from what looks like some underdark region
with a figure hovering around and above them
that looks very reminiscent of Orcus
and his goat-like, hideous face.
And you see the mountain before you a little bit closer than it was before.
And Matamar leads you down and towards Mount Celestia.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
I'm your dungeon master, Russ More.
He, him, also with me today is Sassy Amy More.
Ooh, okay. I will have to live up to it.
So sassy. Shut up.
I don't know. I'm Amy.
She, her, and I play Sullivan Slate.
He, him.
And Tom Lair.
Shut up.
He, him, and I am playing Moot tonight.
Who also goes by he, him.
And Carla Maxted.
Shut up.
She, her, playing Glim who also goes by she, her.
Are you happy you started this, Russ?
Yeah, I didn't start it.
Well, you did.
And joining us again tonight is Kristen Flemmons.
Shut up.
Four times, no.
Kristen, she, her, playing Agath, Godlust, Catholavi, she, her.
Also, Rax.
How would Rax say shut up?
I like it.
And just with his general demeanor, I feel like he's kind of always sassy.
I really like butt wiggle tail flip, I think, also.
Love it.
Yeah, there's a definite sass vibe going on tonight.
I like it.
And I like how we started with just a round of shut up,
which is great for an audio podcast.
We're going to sing some Black Eyed Peas later, though, so it'll be fine.
It's a trek up the mountain, but a silent trek,
because there's apparently nothing else to talk about anymore.
So it's just 45 minutes of just, the weather's nice.
Maybe a guided meditation?
Yeah.
Some visualization.
Love it.
This one brought to you by Calm.
Use promo code DUMBGENES, get 10% off, I think, maybe.
I can't remember what the deal is.
I should probably look that up, because I think we're due for some ads.
Okay, bye.
No, you're not.
You can stick around.
We can't start with shut up and goodbye.
Who's sassy now?
Calm down over there, Mr. Sassy Pants.
Where I am told that I can be sassy is over on Patreon,
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast,
you get access to an exclusive patrons only podcast called The Adventures Of.
Somebody else tell people about it,
because I'm not sassy enough in this moment to tell them about it,
because I'm not in that mood.
Well, if you've been following this Darkest Timeline storyline,
you've run into the character of Opal Lightbrightcliffs,
and that is one of the three main characters of The Adventures Of,
our Patreon game.
So you can see Russ and all his shenanigan laden glory
over on Patreon.
Unhinged is also a term.
Unhinged.
That is great.
When you are a patron, you also get an episode dedicated to you,
like today's patron, Ben Essy.
Thanks, Ben.
Thank you so much.
Thank you, Ben.
It could also be Ben S and a silent E,
but I liked the E on the end.
You know who doesn't have to shut up?
Ben, they can just keep on talking.
They sound great.
Absolutely.
Thank you, Ben.
Join us today at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
And now fuck it.
Let's play.
Shut up.
I did it.
One of us.
I'm playing the game too.
Agoth and Matamar,
you hear the sound of pebbles
that are falling down,
tumbling down after you.
As you hit the bottom of this cavern
that you two have fallen down into.
Oh.
The ground behind you collapsed.
You're in pitch blackness.
I don't know if you have night,
dark night, night, dark vision,
dark night vision.
You see Batman.
That's when you watch Christopher Nolan
movies on your phone.
Yeah.
I don't.
Perfect.
It is pitch black.
Did racks fall?
No, I didn't say racks.
I said agoth and matamar.
I'm glad because it would have been
really extra dangerous for racks to fall.
It would be a whole thing.
I got that.
Helped you get that bridge across the horse.
Wait.
That's what we did.
Yeah.
That's what we did.
It was a challenge, but we got there.
It was a whole episode where we got a bridge across a horse.
I mean, it was a popsicle bridge,
if we're going to be honest about it.
It was.
It was difficult though.
Two of you land.
You're going to take 10 bludgeoning.
How far did we fall?
It's tough to tell, but you felt
like you fell probably 40 or 50 feet
down a rocky embankment that had just like
opened up beneath you for everybody else
as you are collecting yourself down at the bottom.
You see agoth and matamar who are ahead a little bit
in line and they fall into this sinkhole
that quickly fills itself in behind you.
You're in this forested area and we're walking along this path
up the hill.
You were on an upward motion,
up the mountain rather, in an upward motion.
Finally, after much, much travel.
Have we been resting while we've been traveling
or just much, much travel?
You tell me, do you take normal rest
or are you booking it to Bahama?
Because if you're booking it to Bahama,
there's some exhaustion we could imply here,
but maybe you rested.
I'm feeling like Sully would definitely rest.
Yeah, I think so.
I'd sit down for a second.
You have been traveling for several days.
Okay, good.
Okay, long rest it is.
Just to clarify, we've fallen down into the sinkhole
and now it's covered up again.
Yeah, so not like an entity,
but like you fell in and then it collapsed behind you.
Okay, so are we in danger of this whole thing
like filling up with earth or is it...
Was it like an underground cave?
Are we about to be buried alive?
You don't believe so.
Okay.
Like the ground around it filled in
and kind of like followed you down a little ways
but hit a bottleneck or like a stopping point
and that was the kind of pebbles
following down behind you.
So there isn't a rush of earth coming down behind you.
You feel like based on the reverb in the room
that you're probably in a cavern
between 30 and 40 feet across.
Feels very open.
There is a trickling of an underground stream at most.
This is not a beautiful day
and it is not a crickling creek down the sinkhole.
So we're not repeating what we've already done.
I realize that that is the same descriptor I gave you last time.
Okay.
So Agath will let out a string of curses
and dust her shoulders off
and go digging in her pack for a torch
which I have just seen in my inventory.
Perfect.
And ignite said torch
to get a nice look at our non-crickling creek.
The light ablaze.
You see Matamar who appears to be
in some state of unconsciousness
about 10 feet from you.
There is like a water running down
one of the walls often to your right.
You're uncertain of exactly which direction anything is
but it's coming down off the wall
and like running across this cavern.
On the other side of the cavern
there are a couple of different openings
leading out of this space.
Okay.
Agath will go over
and check for obvious head, neck, spine injuries
before violently shaking Matamar
as gently as she can
which is probably not that gentle.
Sure.
Well, if we're checking for injuries
maybe roll a medicine check.
Okey dokes.
Oh, my goodness.
Are you a doctor?
I rolled six, but I got a plus nine to medicine.
So it's a 15.
So you're a doctor.
Agath is a doctor.
You check Matamar over.
There doesn't appear to be any head, neck or spine injuries.
There are some light abrasions on his arms and legs
a little bit of blood,
but nothing that appears life-threatening
if you were to shake them.
Okay.
Matamar.
Little slaps on the cheeks.
Oh, that hurt.
What happened?
We have apparently fallen.
Yeah, no, I got that.
Where are we?
Underground.
Okay.
Where's everybody else?
Not here.
Okay.
Great.
We are alone.
Okay.
Can you stand?
I think so.
Gets up and kind of limps to his feet
and appears to be able to stand and walk.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think I think I'm okay.
Nothing feels broken.
Where did we fall down from?
Can we climb back up?
I'll hoist the torch.
How does it look?
Where you presume you fell because there's still
a little bit of movement in the earth.
There is like a what appears to be a formation
of a cave opening,
but it has collapsed in on itself.
Doesn't appear completely stable,
but it doesn't seem to be falling down towards you
at this moment.
You don't see any daylight,
so you can assume that it is quite a long distance
or at least heavily packed in the area that you came down.
Hmm.
I must say it does not look promising.
Okay, well, if you can't go up,
I guess we got to go through, right?
It's got to come out somewhere.
There's a stream.
I concur.
I will, before we start moving,
try and holler up to the group
to see if anybody can hear or communicate.
I'll try not to actually yell in my microphone.
Rex!
Sunny!
I am a kittens.
Nothing, nothing.
Some more pebbles kind of fall down.
I don't think they can hear us,
and if they can, they're being very quiet.
Like it's a good game of hide and go seek.
It's kind of rude of them to throw us down a hole, though.
Extremely.
Against the rules of any game of hide and seek I have played.
It's like a real extreme version
where you bury the person alive
and maybe call somebody and say,
this is where they are.
Here's the coordinates,
and you got to go find them.
Like that movie with Ryan Reynolds.
What was that called?
I think Buried?
That's kind of apt there.
Agath is just sort of like cocking an eyebrow at Metamar
as he rambles.
But trust that when the Goliath play hide and seek,
it is the most hardcore version of the game.
And even this would be considered inappropriate.
Too hardcore.
If you're not hardcore,
if you live hardcore.
Okay, do we go left or right?
How does the cavern look upstream or downstream?
Is there a noticeable difference?
Not exceptionally.
It's kind of passing from your right to your left
in this cavern.
So there is a smallish passageway
where it's kind of coming in and out and off the wall.
But again, two bisecting tunnels that you could go down.
Well, upstream,
we are more likely to continue upwards towards our goal.
Downstream, perhaps we are more likely to find an exit
large enough for us.
Yeah, that makes sense.
What do you think our friends will do?
Do you think they'll keep going up
or do you think they'll go down?
I am not well enough acquainted with them.
Didn't you guys travel through time together?
That seems like you're pretty close.
It is a surprisingly short acquaintance,
regardless of the time travel.
Downstream.
Let's go.
You head off.
Downstream.
Let's go.
You head off down the tunnel system
leading more downstream, which would be to your left.
And we cut back up to the surface.
Everything's just caved in.
Holy shit.
What happened?
Where did they go?
Is everyone okay?
I'm feeling good.
But we're down too.
Yeah, we've lost a couple of people, so...
But I'm, like, we're all okay, right?
Well, yeah, this is one instance
where being at the back of the line
and being really slow and small
kind of was to my benefit.
Okay, so who has a shovel?
Because I figure we can just start shoveling
and, like, we'll just get right down there.
I've got a spoon.
Okay, does anyone have...
This is like a small shovel.
It got me out of prison one time.
Technically, yes, but it's so...
And I mean, Glim grabs it
and it's so tiny in her hand because...
It's just a small goblin.
I know, I'm just saying...
Well, also, do we want to start digging here?
Because...
So, there was a time
when I used to dig graves.
And...
For a short period.
It wasn't, like, a huge thing that I did.
But as a gravery,
we would dig through holes.
But what I noticed was
if there was already a hole
where I was digging,
I fell in.
Oh.
Right, and also, like, they're down there
and we don't...
Wait, Sully, were you...
Were you digging to rob the graves?
No, it was a job.
But...
So, you were standing
directly above the hole
that you were digging?
Sometimes the hole was, like,
already under the ground.
But somehow
it caved in on itself from above.
No one quite knows
the mechanics of how
a sinkhole can, indeed,
cover itself back up.
But it happens
more than you think.
And as you dig into it, it just
all, you know, into itself.
And then you go along with it.
Which seems to be exactly
what happened here.
This is a very relatable situation for you.
I'm glad we have you along on this ride, Sully.
So, I don't know if digging through here,
if that's just gonna get us stuck underground.
We're kinda on a mission here.
There's at least
one really capable
person down there.
Guaranteed only one.
I barely know.
I barely know Madam Ma.
So, you know, I'm not gonna say anything.
Although, kinda wimped out
when we had to murder all of his friends and family
and stuff, I'm just saying.
Okay, too soon. Like, he was very
emotional and we agreed to take care of that
for... I did not say that in front of him.
Actually, we have not
yet... Hello!
Hello? You guys!
Anyone?
I don't animals have real good hearing.
Rex, can you hear them? Can you understand
me? Do you know what I'm
saying?
Rex just starts maybe chewing on some of
Sully's hair. I don't think he
speaks English. No, I
mean, probably has basic commands down.
More like a pet
than anything. Well, and I assume
if they were... He bears his teeth at Flamingons.
Not a pet. An independent
entity that tags along
with a humanoid figure.
Well, I think that if he could
hear her,
like, he'd be pricking his ears and
stuff. So, they must be real far down there.
That's what I'm saying. Yeah, absolutely. Okay.
Rex, can you hear?
Well, no. What I mean is, if they were
screaming down there,
he'd probably be like,
oh, oh, and trying to get to his
person. That's what I'm saying. But he's eating
my hair right now as we speak.
So, I don't think that... Yeah, no, not this yet.
I think Sully's right. I think if
Rex had better hearing
than us and was able to pick it up,
he would be behaving a little
bit differently instead of just
his usual casual self. Very
casual. Very concerned. He's
real cash. So, they must be
so far down that even
the horse can't hear it. So,
like,
do we go down after them?
Do we trust that
they're gonna get
out? Are you saying we leave
them behind? No.
I'm putting out our options. Is this one of
those times where
you don't want to say the bad thing in front
of me, so you're all just talking around it
and, like, you all think they're dead down there?
Is that
what's happening?
No, I don't think they're dead.
So, we did just relate
this to digging a grave, though.
Well, that is true.
Yeah.
I'm glad we're all on the same page.
They're definitely alive. They're totally fine.
For sure.
I mean, for sure Agath is.
Yeah.
Fall? Not a problem.
Mademar?
Oh, gosh. Yeah, seems like he bruised like a peach.
Like a
strong wind could knock that guy over.
Yep. Okay, so what are
our options here?
We've got the path ahead of us. We've got the
forest around us.
There was, like,
we've been traveling
for a while.
We seen a river in a little bit?
I've been looking at, like, lots of trees
and birds and mostly, like, the
the dirt on the path
in front of me. I'm not
I will
be the first to admit that I have a couple thoughts
and observational
skills is
is not on my list of strengths.
Well, it's good to know where you're
strong and where you'd
start paying attention.
Well, I mean, last night when we made
camp, we got fresh
water, so
we're on a mountain. There's got to be
rivers and streams
heading down.
Sure.
Everything is totally different here in
Celestia, which I guess is totally possible.
Like, maybe rivers flow uphill. I don't know.
I think we probably wouldn't
when I say we would have noticed, I mean
you guys would have noticed
if the stream was running uphill.
You probably would have been like, that's weird.
Yeah, I don't recall
that happening. No.
Seems gravity still
acting as gravity does.
Great.
Okay, so I know.
We're going to have to go down and get them.
Or they're going to get out on their own.
Yep. Yep.
That seems like what's going to happen.
Should we, like, vote?
Or... So do we wait for
them to get out?
Well, are they going to get out through here?
I don't know. That would be terrifying.
Wouldn't that be so scary? I know we'd think
it'd be undead coming and like
that's a bit fresh for us. Wait, did that ever
happen when you were a gravery?
No, but if I was, I'd chop that hand off.
Do you hear that, Agath? I'd chop
it off!
Just in case she's like right there and was about to put
a hand up and... Was like waiting? Yeah.
For the right moment? I'm going to say
I'm going to say, like, what if
they are trapped within the Earth?
Oh my god,
then we probably have to dig them out because they're buried alive.
These are options.
Well, I did not...
We seem very nonchAlydint about it.
Get your spoon, I guess.
Yeah, I think, um, yeah, Glim's
going to start, like, just with her
hands digging. I looked.
I don't think she has anything
helpful. I mean, in my mind, I have one of those
like folding backpacking shovels,
you know, to like bury my poop in the woods.
But that's, uh, I don't know
that that's a fantasy item. If
Lipsinki was here. Yes, exactly.
We really need Lipsinki.
But yeah, I think, uh,
Glim's is going to start, yeah, like
digging, just moving Earth to try and
get to them.
But I could use my
war pick, like the pick
part to like...
I mean, the dirt's probably pretty loose
because it already fell. But like, I'm working with what tools
I got here. Sure.
I have a hammer.
I'll start scraping
the dirt away with the hammer. This reminds me of
some time when I was, like, trapped
under the ground because of,
like, a job that we were on.
And, like, I
needed to get back up and out.
So, like, I just used some magic
and I, like, parted the Earth
and moved it around me. But, like,
that doesn't seem like something that's relevant to this
situation. Oh my god.
If only there was somebody with us...
Wait, what? Who could move dirt, like,
magically. Yeah, like, that would be
really cool. Oh, it'd be so helpful
because... Oh my god, can you do that?
I mean, probably
not, but let's take a look.
FlammieKids, you can do that.
I can? Well, you just said you
did it once. Can you not? Did you forget how?
Well, I didn't do it again since
then. Like, it was kind of that one time thing
that I can move the Earth!
Well, that's great because I can't.
Nor can I, except with this hammer.
And not well. Okay, well, just give
me a second here and I'll see what I can do.
And FlammieKids begins
to cast Mold Earth
beneath
her.
So, you can target an area of loose
Earth, you can instantly excavate
it, move it along the ground
and deposit it up to five feet away.
Sounds perfect.
Five foot cubes. So, we're gonna be here a little
while, but it can happen. Okay,
uh,
I feel like we're making some
real... Yeah, okay, I'm gonna put the dirt over there, then
you just use your shovel to just make sure that it's
back far enough, okay? You mean your spoon?
Yeah, that's exactly what I mean.
You can embiggen it, right?
The spoon, that is.
Oh, yeah, I could probably do something like that.
Look at us doing cruel shit that's on our
character sheet.
Remember how there's magic in D&D?
That's crazy, I can't do that stuff.
I mean, I used to have something in that neighborhood.
I'm just checking my
spell list here. I feel like I'll regret this
when Russ kills me, but
I could also take off, like, my
chest plate and use that as, like, a big
scoop. Right, that's gonna
be more effective at moving loose
Earth. Yeah, immediately
as you remove it, there is a...
An arrow flies out of nowhere.
Yes, I do have the
enlarged spell. Great, here, make this
spoon bigger for Glim.
Let's do it.
So, yeah, I go ahead and cast
enlarge on the spoon, and it becomes
a much
larger spoon, but still is not, like, a
full-size shovel yet. How big can you
make that? I can basically, like,
double the size of things.
So it's a really big...
So it's a regular-size spoon.
Now it's like a regular-size spoon, so if we were
just about to have soup, this would be
perfect. I mean, that is
really... What level is that spell?
Second level. Sweet!
Do you have to roll up her wild magic now?
Sure does.
It's a lot more impressive when it's cast
on a person, because the person
goes from, like, medium to large
size, as opposed to just a
small spoon to a bigger spoon.
It's gone to, like, one of those
collectibles, you know, that our
grandparents always had,
to just your average spoon.
Yep. Love this.
While all that is
happening, is there anything audible
down in the cavern that might
stop Agath and
Matamar from happily trekking
away?
I don't
know at that moment,
just because we stated that it's
pretty far up. We talked about it for so
long. And they talked about...
They were very nonplussed about it for such a
long time as your friends disappeared.
So, no, I think you have gone
off. You may be here...
I wouldn't
say you'd hear
the Mold Earth. Like, you'd hear the
movement of the underground
tunneled sounds, like that
kind of sound.
But nothing directly that you
would relate to
movement, shoveling, or otherwise.
Mostly because it's a very tiny spoon that
they're using before they start using
the Mold Earth.
But yeah, we
cut back down to you.
You, too, are carrying on
down this path,
this corridor,
that follows
the direction of the stream
going back down
the mountains, which you can presume as the
stream is running.
You're following the direction in which it's running.
And
as you're moving
and continuing forward,
there's, like,
becomes this bioluminescence
that begins to appear
along the walls.
It becomes brighter and brighter
the longer you walk down.
Matamar turns to you
as it's been in appearance for
quite a while, and he says,
I don't know if I've ever seen
this before. It seems kind of
like something that's not in the tunnel systems
that I live in.
It's interesting.
It is
quite beautiful in its way.
It is, yeah. It gives, like, a Glimer
and a little more clarity in the situation.
And as you continue to walk forward,
it gets brighter.
And make a
perception check
or whatever's higher.
That or your passive perception.
So I rolled. It wasn't good.
It's a 10. My passive perception
is 13. Okay.
You feel like out of the corner
of your eye you see movement
in the
light that is being
enlightened.
Can I go? Are there tiny
little creatures in it?
Maybe. I'm going to go peer at it.
So you kind of catch it out of the corner of your eye
and begin to move closer to it.
And as you are watching it,
the movement disappears as
you begin to focus on it.
But you look closer at it.
And it looks like
not just
the surface of
this cavern, but like the
actual walls
of this cavern are giving
this light. And the
longer you observe it,
if you continue to observe it,
you do
feel like not just whatever's
appeared to be on the surface,
but like the walls themselves
are shifting around.
Hmm.
On second thought,
this
pathway now feels somewhat
ominous. Why?
It seems to be moving.
Do you also observe
this phenomenon?
Madame R moves over
and is watching it intently.
I'm going to poke the wall
with
my blade.
No man, spores.
With your blade?
Make a dexterity saving throw.
What do I have in my hand?
Nice.
Just see what I actually have in my hand.
Actually, not a dexterity saving throw.
A strength
saving throw.
Sweet. No worries then, right?
Yep.
Goliath!
Oh, there we go. Finally.
Strength saving throw.
I would have thought that would have been... Why is my wisdom
and charisma so much higher than my strength?
Probably the cleric levels.
It's still a 21.
You begin to poke it with the
blade, and you begin to feel
like the wall closing around
it, like in a click quick motion.
And yeah, yank it back.
And as you do,
there is this audible
high-pitched squeal that
comes from it. Sweet.
The walls themselves begin
to contract.
I'm going to scoop up
Madame R under one arm, and just
start booking it back the way we came
as much as is possible.
Back the way you came? Okay.
Yeah. This way was a bust.
We're going the other way.
This way sucks. I don't like it.
I love it.
So yeah, you turn around in high tail.
He's like, what happened? What was that noise?
What's going on? Where are we going?
Do we have to go down the mountain?
No? Okay.
And you kind of look
over your shoulder or depending on how you
scoop Madame R, maybe he can see.
And he's like, um, hey, hey,
hey, there's something back there. It's
closing in. And you turn and you
look as you're running and like the cave
is closing in.
But as it like almost closes
entirely, it expands
again. And down at the end
of the hall, illuminated
by this bioluminescence,
there's this figure that
is like this hulking figure
with long, like sharp, jagged
legs and arms.
And it
lets out the same kind of
shrill screech that
echoes down the hall. Make a wisdom
saving throw, please.
What did you do?
Oh, sweet. Um,
that is a 27.
Wow. Dang.
Are you tired of rolling
my dice? You don't like them?
No, your dice rolled well. I just don't want to take all the good rolls
from them.
That was an 18 on the dice.
They may already be tapping.
That was one. I did it.
You're welcome. You have this like
intense pain
that goes through your
head as this
scream like reverberates down the halls
and stones are
coming loose as they're going.
You make it back to
you don't take any damage, but you manage
to make back to
the cavern in which
you started. You do
hear as you enter that
cavern the sound of
like a moving
earth you could equate it to.
Just heavy stone
movement coming from the area
in which you presumed you had
fallen. Okay.
There's this lumbering
thudding of footsteps
tearing their way down behind you.
Sweet. I'm going to do
what I realized I should have done
after everybody was looking at
their spells. I was like, huh, spells.
I have thaumaturgy. So I'm going to
make my voice real loud.
Okay. And now that I can
hear actually things happening up there
like the real
hey you guys.
An extraction
would be helpful. There are
malicious entities down here.
Something about it.
Something about an extraction is imminent
and entities are
it sounds bad. Probably like
there's probing going on down there.
Probing? Oh my god. Yeah.
Why would you assume there's
probing going on? Well, extraction
entities panic.
Extraction means to take out
probing is to put something in.
Okay. Then somebody is probing a
goth down there and we need to extract
it. Like, hey guys
come extract this entity
from the looking. Okay, you gotta keep molding
the earth, man. You can't get down there.
Okay. Flame Beacons goes back
to moving the earth.
You hear the pace of that movement
picking up in both
speed and intensity
above you as you as these
lumbering footsteps and shrill cries
like burst into
this place and you see
it and it's got like this mantis like
disfigured mantis face.
Yeah. And his long
sharp jagged like
pincer claws
that move with like these
these insectoid
almost they're
insectoid like legs but
like there's the
there's flesh upon them not
just like an exoskeleton
and it's like it's
decaying all the way down.
Roll for initiative.
Alrighty. I will have
tried to deposit Matamar
somewhere back
in the cavern
as he's useless
to you.
I'm assuming so, yeah.
14.
Everybody else can roll as
soon as that opens you will also be
in initiative
order. Yep, there's mine.
Two
plus six.
Eight.
Solid. Thanks. Eleven.
And Flaming Kins is at the top.
So Flaming Kins begins is
continuing to pick up the pace.
You feel
she's like I feel I feel movement beneath
me. We got to be getting close.
A goth.
This thing crashes in
lets out this cry.
Stones are falling down the
sides of the of the cavern
and it is making its way like
beelining straight towards you.
I have a
vicious lance, which is very
long. I guess I'm just walking around
with an extremely
long lance on my back at all times.
Maybe it's telescopic. Yeah. Oh, I like
that.
Pull it off and
big ol' lance. I'm gonna try and keep
this thing at a distance.
But yeah,
this doesn't look like it wants to be friends.
I'm gonna
I'm gonna go for some
clubs. Okay.
First attack is a 15.
That does not hit.
Better.
21.
That will hit. Yes. That is 14
points of piercing damage.
You're aiming for like the center
of this center mass. Yeah.
You stab it in.
As you do, you
see more of that by
luminescence and it begins to
pull on the blade.
Pull on the lance into
you. I'm gonna hit it one more time.
Okay.
Oh, nevermind. No, I'm not. That was a two.
No, you
will not. In fact, it is
make a strength check. Okay.
Six. You feel
the lance being pulled
like into this creature
away from you. That's
bad. Yeah, so it's like
it's a long one giving you a
reach. It's like halfway and you
see it's like sticking out the other side
of this creature, which doesn't
seem as
it doesn't seem as
concerned about that
as when you stabbed into it.
Is
anything else you can or would like to do?
Let's try it. You know,
I experimented
a little bit with
magic since getting here.
Not super comfortable with it yet,
but Agatha's gonna cast
spiritual weapon.
Love it. So what does
spiritual weapon do?
This is not exactly
what I think Agatha would do,
but I really like the idea of a big bug swatter.
Yeah.
I like that. That's
good. A floating spectral
fly swatter is
gonna appear
right behind
our mantis friend.
I can make a melee
spell attack with it
when I cast it. Oh, awesome.
Oh, that's a d12. That is the
wrong dice. Where are my d12s? Yeah, you're not
gonna hit very much with that.
18?
18 will hit. 5.
Bug swatty
weapon. I think that is
probably radiant.
Thank you. That's the word.
Awesome. Yeah, it
swats down. You said it came up
behind, so it swats down like onto the
back of this thing. You see
its sizzle and
a flare of light
comes up from behind it as this hits
and it lets out another shrill
pained cry
as that happens.
It's the creature's turn
now. So it charges towards
you and is going to attack
you with its pincer claws.
That's going to be
19 for the first one.
No. 21 for the
second one. Apparently, no.
No? Oh,
God. Wow.
Let's see if it recharges
that. It does.
It's now like close proximity
to you. It's going to let out another one of
those screams into your face.
Please make a wisdom saving throw.
Gladly.
Damn.
26. Okay.
Very wise. At this proximity,
you're still going to take 4
psychic damage. Not a problem.
And like
all the little bones in your ears
are vibrating back and forth. You kind
of lose your
bAlydince for a brief moment.
You're not affected
stunned or anything like that at this moment.
But you
sense if you
get lower or fail on that
that it could
do some damage to you.
We go to
the moot. Flammikins has
picked up the pace on moving
this earth.
You hear
down below, all of you hear down below
an intense commotion.
These cries from whatever this creature
is are reverberating up
and through the earth. So you sense that you're getting close.
Is there anything that you can or would like to do
to assist
or encourage or
speed up the process in any way?
As Flammikins is moving around
this earth, there's probably like some loose
earth here and there
from all of this.
I would like to use my gust
cantrip and create
a small blast of air that's capable
of moving. This is one object, but like
it has to weigh no
more than 5 pounds. I'll say just a bunch of dirt
that's like 5 pounds
worth. Is that one
object too?
Alright, perfect. And yeah, so I will
do that.
We are moving earth off into the side
helping along quicker.
Ooh, I rolled a net 20 on my wild match.
You're doing okay then. Glim, same
scenario for you.
Moot is blowing the dirt
away. Flammikins is actively
molding it. You're
spooning it. No, I've been
using my chest plate.
I know, I'm just saying. The spoon is so much
better in the picture. I know.
So you are using your actions to
continue to dig.
Sully.
Is just shouting words of encouragement
at this point. There's like nothing
that he, I think he maybe
tried with a teeny spoon and was just like
aw, what the fuck is this? Come on,
you guys are doing great. Moot, blow
harder. Yeah,
you're doing great Glim. Like, my
goodness. That's going
to get everywhere though. It's going to be all up in you.
Flammikins,
you're doing a... Not
over here, not over here. Sorry.
I'm like looking through everyone's like, I'm looking
through my spell sheet and I was like, okay, I'm going to check
my inventory. Where the fuck did I
get an absorbing tattoo from?
Whoa, what, what is that?
Welcome
to the middle.
You know what's great is moving your microphone
while you're doing it so you try to avoid
any like clicks or stuff. So there's probably some
in that little song there. Hey everybody,
it's me. Just hanging out with
you in the middle here. Not a huge
party in the middle except for the fact
that you and I are here.
And that is the biggest party.
And today I have
a show that I am very excited
about sharing with you. It's called
Adventure Incorporated. It's
a D&D actual play podcast because
that's what we love to share. That's what we love to play.
That's who we are. And Adventure Inc
has an expanse of lore
set in a deep fantasy
world, thoughtful
storytelling, surprising twists
and ridiculous players. What
does that sound like? It sounds
like a good time is what it does.
If you listen
to them, of course
they have an amazing show that you
want to go follow and subscribe
and like and share and do all that great stuff
with. But they invited me to
come play at their table for some of their Patreon
content and I got to go on a stream with them
and they are just the most delightful people
and I want you to go pull up a seat at their table
every Monday as the adventure
for them continues.
So go find Adventure
Incorporated anywhere
you listen to podcasts. I'm going to put a link
down in the descriptions for you
for this episode here so
you can go find it. Super easy.
Adventure Incorporated.
They are lovely people.
They play a lovely show and I want you
to go listen to them. That's it for the
middle. Let's get you back
to the episode. Okay, thanks.
Talk to you soon. Bye
now.
You got an absorbing
tattoo. That's nothing I looked up.
Like I don't know how that ended up in here.
It might have been something that I added
to sheets because I think I went
in and added some things to sheets
without telling anybody. Yeah, you definitely
did. Maybe. So maybe take a look
through your things. Maybe I put some presents in there.
I don't know. I've been reading my character
sheet and like damn I've got all kinds
of cool stuff that we've
certainly never used before. Nothing for
digging though.
This tattoo won't help anybody dig anything.
Back down in the cavern,
Matamar, who has a
slingshot unbeknownst to anybody else
is
going to
take a shot at the head
of this creature for a 22.
Well done, bud.
Wow. I was going to say he's going to
put someone's eye out.
That's entirely possible too.
Especially in the eyes are big compound
eyes. That is only
two damage but does hit pretty
squarely into one of the eyes of this
creature. How irritating.
Very irritating.
You're so close to it I got that you see it
hit and like it
shakes its head
and turns and looks at
Matamar who at that moment,
turns and looks is like oh, oh fuck.
I'm trying to help.
I'm trying to be good and he takes
a shot. He takes his movement
to try to hide
in some of the rubble but
unfortunately does not
hide well enough so you can still kind of see
a teddy bear poof poking out.
He just covers
his eyes. Flameykin's turn.
She's going to move more earth. You
anybody down with her so
I assume Glim,
Moot you are pretty close
by so you feel like the ground
begin to tremor for lack
of a better term. Like it's losing
structure so you feel probably
pretty soon that you're going to be able to get through
or fall through one of the two.
But not on her
turn as she continues to do that.
Agoth it's back to you. This thing is right in
your face. Sweet.
Your lance is kind of sticking out halfway
through both sides
of this creature.
Speaking of a
slingshot, just zip by.
What do you want to do? How close am I
to one of the cavern walls?
Did you position yourself in the
center of this room when you ran in? Did you back
yourself against a wall? No.
I would have been trying to put Matamar
somewhere safe and then been in the
center for maximum mobility. Sure.
I think we said like 30 to 50
so you're
with the torch kind of lit into
the ground.
You're probably in like that 15 to 20
range from the nearest wall.
Alright so I have an idea.
I have a vision. Love it.
Let me know what I imagine.
We've got this big buggy head
with its weird compound eyes
right in her face. Agath would love
to like grin
and take in the battle moment
and head butt it in the head
as hard as she can. And I
have something called shield
shove and I'm wondering if I can sort of
use that and color it to like
I would like to run this thing with
the lance into a wall and try
and pin it on a wall like a stupid
bug in one of those displays.
Yeah. I
love that. Okay.
So you're gonna. So
I guess it's probably a
straight up strength or athletics
check to see
you know A
are you able to push it and B
do you have enough speed to
get it into the wall. So that's
a 19 on the dice plus 9.
So a 28. Oh yeah.
Then yeah
absolutely. So yeah the scene plays
out exactly like that. You
like bear down on this lance
and with all your might begin like
charging towards this creature whose
limbs are like beyond
you right now as you've
moved in close to it
and skewer it to the wall.
It
takes I don't
think any additional damage because it's already
through it but you hear
it like pierce into the stone behind
you and as you
take a step back not entirely so
much as to take an attack or anything
like that you feel like you've
you've stuck it to
the wall. Sweet.
That is the shield shove is
technically a bonus action. Can I still do my attacks
or yeah. All right. So I'm going to say the first
one was the head but so I'll do like an
unarmed
one for that guy.
Natural 20
on the head but
yeah that's
just four damage
straight up. I don't think there's a dice so
I guess it doesn't double on the natural 20
which is too bad but oh well
I mean we can say it doubles it's fine.
Yeah it definitely is double
and then I'll pull out now
that the lance is a nice
bug pin I'll just pull out
my
double bladed
scimitar
and take the other two attacks with
that. All right.
15 I think is a no
right. 15 was no. Yep.
And then a 17.
17 we'll hit. So that's
another seven damage on that one.
Okay. So yeah you hit
hard with your head which kind of reels it
back and closer to the wall.
You swing your scimitar the
first time and miss
just based on its movement
and then strike in the second time.
More of this luminescence like flares
out of it and it's like scatters
across the room and onto the
ground beside you.
I like to imagine doing like a big
you know wipe of the face the bioluminescence
off.
That's awesome. She's having fun
now.
Anything else you would like to
do? It's like with the Thaumaturgy
still going never mind no rush.
I got
this one.
At that you do
hear like a rumbling sound
coming back from the way you came.
Of course yeah. There's 12 more.
Maybe. Moot.
Do we are we
able to see like any kind of
daylight for lack of a better
term? We don't see any nightlight
coming from below.
You do
like the ground beneath you is less
sturdy. You feel like there's there's
certainly movement in it. It's not as
compacted as it was before.
You do hear the sounds
of the battle below you
more clearly.
So you get yeah you do have
a solid sense that something
extraordinary could push this
through perhaps on this turn.
All right. How does everybody feel
about a lightning bolt on
the spot if I get everyone clear?
If you warn us. Great. Yeah.
I mean would that work Russ? Thoughts?
A lightning bolt.
There's only one way to know.
There's only one way to know.
Yeah.
So you do you want to
you want to cast it on this turn
is what your goal is yes?
In a perfect world. Okay.
Okay. What about thunder step?
Thunder step could be good. I'm going
to I guess could show up and make that
little like sonic boom type thing.
That I could get on board
with not hurting anybody. Lightning
a little less believable that
based on the way we're working
this like that they'd be able to move out of the way
and not be take some damage.
Thunder step though you're blasting it
down. That could cave the thing in.
Sure. Okay. I look forward
to tumbling down with it. Perhaps.
Who knows?
Yeah. So
kind of light ball moment
says everybody out of the way out of the way
out of the way. I got this. Okay.
You got it Mootsie.
Sully scurries up a tree.
You weren't even down in the hole. You're like I'm out.
Yep. And I think
Glim uses this opportunity to put her
very dirty
chess play back on. Sure. Yeah.
Okay. I will
cast thunder step so
I'll teleport to the spot I want to be
which is like four feet away from where I already am
but that's fine.
It's the showmanship of it.
Yeah exactly right. A thunderous
boom will sound
where I disappear from.
So I guess I want to be in
the hole and disappear from the hole. Okay there we go.
So I disappear out of
the hole leaving behind a thunderous
boom that will do
20 thunder damage.
Okay.
Yeah. So yeah.
You give the call to move out of the way.
Give me a call. Everybody
clear out. Clear out. Okay. Okay.
I'll be up here. Thunderous boom
echoes out and the ground like
heaves down
with you.
I presume you like teleport like off
into the wall of it
at least. So maybe you slide down.
You reappear on the wall
and begin cascading down with this
earth like a
badass.
Surfing it down. That's right.
Surfing down.
Flamikin's in glim. The ground gives way
beneath you. Same thing. You've kind of
scattered off to the side.
Perhaps not quite
as gracefully as Moot but you are still
looking pretty cool riding down into
this agoth. You hear this loud
clap that comes
from the cavern above
you and behind you now because
you've moved to the other side.
The earth begins to fall
in and you see your travel companions
cascading
into this space.
Anything you want to do after that or can do
after that? Roll a wild magic surge.
I can definitely do that.
That's a 16. I think we're still
good because we triggered one the last time we did
this. So probably at a three or four
right now.
Okay. Love it.
You cascade into this space. Sully
you have moved up a tree.
You see your friends fall down
into this hole so you now see this black
pit. A little bit of the light from the day
you can see them
beginning to move towards
and into this cavern. You don't quite see the creature
from this position but you do
have an ability to go down this hole now.
Instead of doing
that.
I'm going to tattoo myself.
Sully
Sully
Well because I said Sully scurried last time
and now just Sully is stuck in.
I know what my character is called.
Sully instead
shimmies down this tree.
Takes a rope out of his pack.
Ties it around
the tree. Comes
over and throws
it down the hole.
And just waits at the top.
You guys got this?
Or just let me know. I'm just going to stay up here
so someone can pull you up.
Yeah it's a good idea.
I am the smallest.
Well I've got racks up here.
Oh sorry Glim.
I skipped
you
and Sully
turned there. Your turn.
Okay so I'm down there now?
You are down there now. Yes.
And when I look around
I just see that a goth has like
a giant bug creature pinned to the wall.
But it's still writhing?
Still very much writhing.
Trying to get at her.
Okay. So yeah seen as you come down
this big bug skewered onto the wall.
A goth within its reach.
So it's trying to like claw
at her. Matamar you see a little
tuft of hair off into the side.
Very well hidden.
Perfect.
Bioluminescence kind of scattered
blood splatter kind of vibe.
You do hear also now that
the dirt is settling and
cascading in. A rumbling from deeper
within the cave. Sounds
like earth movement
or the movement of a lot of feet
or creatures.
Coming down from a left
cavern. Maybe just a couple
creatures that have a lot of feet.
Just two with a lot of feet.
They're not even big. Like a Mario
Wiggler.
Don't wake it.
And do I see the rope
hanging down there?
Perfect.
So yeah.
Matamar maybe just
there's a rope and just
and I'm going to attack that creature
and try and you know like chop its head off
or whatever.
So that is a
oh damn.
32
and then also
Chris is like what's taking
her so long?
This is two double digit numbers
I need to add up.
21
21 and 32.
Are those going to hit?
This pinned bug?
You betcha. Both will.
That can't go anywhere.
Great great great.
So that
is going to be
31
piercing
and then two
radiant.
I read my character sheet.
Very piercing.
Slightly godlike.
Sweet yeah. You charge
into this room and a couple big
hits and
like
it's no longer stuck but it's because
you've cleaved into this thing. So
you now realize that yeah
of course the bioluminescence is coming out
of this creature and it's now covering
you your
blade and your arms
and
moving down to the ground.
As it lets out like this final death
cough.
You see
down this. You have a clear shot down
this one tunnel where the sound
appears to be coming from.
And the stones are loosening off
the walls and you see
what looks like a mass
of this light moving
down the hallway.
Kind of like
what's the what's the poster
the horror movie slither.
Like all the like the leech
looking things.
It was the girl in the bathtub. That's the one yeah.
Okay guys let's go go go go.
Let's go there's a rope let's go.
Matamar has already bolted.
He actually loosed a slingshot like as it was
happening and like it goes like wide
but is
climbing back up the back up the way.
If we go
back up to the top Flamikins Kins
is going to try to
close the cavern
before she leave.
Hey Moot you want to let some light
go and I'll close the cave. Yeah that sounds
great and like
Moot like pushes up his sleeves like okay
here we go. Okay so
these two spells happening like almost
simultaneously as these creatures
are bursting forth into this
space and lightning is released
into them
blowing them back and this shrill
like high pitched
tiny screams are
coming from all of these different individual
creatures blasting them back and then the mold
earth closes down this cavern
leaving open the one
to the right still.
But blocking them in so that they cannot
break free and come attack
you. Everybody's trying
to get back up the
rope as far as the last
call was. Yeah seems like a good idea.
Love it. After that
everybody else is making their way back up the
rope
where you make it back to the
top. Moot and
Flamikins Kins are the last to
come. You're going to wait a moment just
to make sure that they have stopped and that they're
not going to break through.
You give it a moment and it doesn't appear that they've
done so. Flamikins Kins begins
to move the earth back down a little bit
trying to get it to collapse back in on itself.
It's not working as well because it's blown
open quite considerably.
Well that's a
that was a time
wasn't it? Yeah you're doing
okay Agatha.
What did you see down there? The bioluminescence
was pretty
before it started
trying to kill us.
The giant
bugs are
not as pretty but
have a very satisfying
crunch.
Very cool.
Very cool.
Thank you for the assistance.
Oh well
we had to figure out a way to get down there
and fortunately
I was reminded that I know how to do
some pretty cool shit.
Otherwise it sounded
like we were going to leave you there.
Not going to lie.
Sully did mention it.
Sully's busy tying up the
untying the rope over there.
We don't have to
talk about it. Not a lot of blame
but just remember if there's like a life or death
situation
could go either way.
The mission must continue. That's right.
That's right.
This episode featured music from Epidemic Sound
and sound effects from Epidemic Sound,
Boom Library and Sound Ideas.
A huge thank you to our supporting producers.
Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babyok,
Count Waterflame, Jacob Madden,
Christian Brown, Devin Michaels,
Craig Zeiss, Aaron Stevens,
Darylith, Lulahan, L.A. Branton,
ALex Serran, Perry Mathey,
Nathaniel Teeter,
and more.
Thank you.
Thank you.
And thank you to Aaron, Perry Mathey,
Nathaniel Teeter, and Niklas Cooper.
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We'll talk again soon.
Oh, he took our shut-ups to heart.
No, uh, I'm just thinking of the perfect way to get into this because while I put, while
I put point form notes, I don't create ins or outs.
Russ did take a gummy.
It's a liberal pour on the wine, but no gummy.
That's fine.
Origins and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.